gift of the hurricane


After the  hurricane, I didn’t go up to my roof deck. I was too upset by the storm and the sleazy dentist who, in the midst of the horrible week without power, told me that the only way to fix my broken tooth was to get an implant. I was told it would “jeopardize” the tooth next to if they tried to restore it. You might immediately sense that was bullshit, especially if they made you put the $3100 on your credit card right then and there, before getting the implant (the same day as extraction? I was clueless) and being sent off to teach for four hours. “Oh, yes, it will be fine!”

You might of known better, but you also might have had power, internet, heat, hot water, transit, and an unbroken tooth. Since I was leaving for PR in less than 48hrs and didn’t want a mercury filling hanging in my mouth all week and I had no way to research without internet, no time to go to and from Queens, well, I decided to trust them. hurricane-giftThat was the biggest mistake I made in a long time. That the surgeon, who, wasn’t I lucky? just happened to be in that day looked more like a used car salesman than a surgeon should have tipped me off, but you know. I just wanted my tooth fixed safely. I didn’t want to jeopardize another one to what, $4000 more dollars? They also lied about the cost and overcharged me a grand.

I’ll leave the rest of the story for later, as of course I’m fighting the swindle. I want my tooth back. I saw another dentist with the xrays and was told it could have been safely restored and my insurance would have paid for every penny. They don’t cover the implants, not “because they say it’s cosmetic” as the sleazy dentist asserted, but because there is a much cheaper way to fix it. Now I’m out a perfectly good tooth, went through a lot of pain, and out thousands of dollars so these assholes, who make ten times what I do a year, could make some cash. GROSS.

Anyway, because of this ordeal, I couldn’t bear to see if my roof deck had been blown to Brooklyn. But finally it was time to store the a/c, so I went up. Not only was it more or less intact, with things blown about a bit (see above) but the hurricane left a gift! A massive six by four foot thing of some assuredly famous guy, with a big cutout in the middle. What is it? Who is it? I don’t know. Daniel said it was George Clooney. Of course! Krissy said, no, it’s the guy from Sex in the City. Okay! I’m still not sure. But what are the chances this weird thing would land in my tiny deck? From where? From what heights? Dunno. I’ll trade it for a tooth, though.